By my own admission…dick pics are not welcome here.

Gentlemen…oh wait…I’m not talking to you. Let me start over…GUYS…much better! This is for the typical guy…you know the one. He’s the one commonly referred to as “douche”.

How have we arrived at place in this world where sending a “dick pic” has become more common than opening a fucking door? And for that matter…more acceptable?

It may be presumptuous of me to say this but I believe I speak for the majority in this instance. What ever happened to common decency and a conversation. You will never win me over with a “dick pic”…I need to know that you are ruled by something more than your second brain. For instance…show me there is something that rattles around in your skull besides thoughts of your own penis…show me substance.

Just for your information…the penis is not pretty. I’m more interested in your smile. Can you carry on a conversation? Do you have beautiful, rugged hands? Are you nice to kids, waiters, and dogs (this is important!)? Send me a pic of you laughing so I can see the way your eyes light up when you’re happy. If you want to entice me then please…for the sake of being different…show me your soul.

The bottom line is this…if you feel so inclined and enamored by your least attractive appendage that you feel an overwhelming urge to send a picture of it…consider yourself blocked. For the record…If I choose…I will see it up close and personal…but I…and I alone…get to make that decision…it will always be my choice…so keep your uninvited dick pics to yourself.

Rant over…

© S.L. Heaton 2016

Shawna Heaton, aka Priss, is just a girl with some words. Words that spent entirely too long locked up inside. She’s a mom…grandma…aspiring writer…gym junkie…and all around smart ass. She’s on a journey…she doesn’t know where to but she intends to enjoy the ride.

Follow her extraordinary journey at S.L. Heaton