A section where I take one topic and hit it from two different bipolar perspectives. This is the place where we encourage you to join in on the conversation, share your experience, and let us know where YOU stand.
MINDTRIP CROSSFIRE: BIPOLAR EDITION #3 When I Am Quiet
Contributors: Nicole Lyons & Dori Owen
WHEN I AM QUIET…
Please Do Not Do This
I know you worry when I seem quieter than usual, and I appreciate it I really do. But, sometimes it isn’t Bipolar Disorder that has me quiet. Sometimes I’m just like you and I need that peace. I know I’m a paradox and it’s hard to keep up. Thank you for being there. I can imagine the frustration it must cause. I’ll try my hardest to let you know what’s going on with me, but please do not do these things:
- Do not keep asking over and over if I have taken my medication, once is fine.
- Do not keep asking over and over what is wrong, if there is something, I will tell you.
- Do not suggest that someone somewhere has it worse than I do, I’m aware of this.
- Do not assume that I am sliding into depression if I just want to be alone for a bit.
- Do not get upset if I don’t want to participate in socializing at this moment in time.
- Do not forget, you too go through these times where you just want to be left alone, it’s ok for me too.
- Do not forget that I love you. I appreciate you. I know that sometimes I’m difficult, but I will always be there for you.
So if I’m quiet–it may just be because I want some peace too, just like you do. Try to understand it’s not always about my illness.
WHEN I AM QUIET….
Please Do This
I am a person of words. In conversation, in writing, in every way. One would never describe me as shy. If I am quiet–something is wrong. And that something these days is usually because I am down, or at my worst, depressed. If you want to help me, and others like me, please do these things:
- Tell me you love me.
- Acknowledge to me, yes, this sucks!
- Assure me it’s not my fault. You know that I never asked to be this way.
- Please tell me you won’t abandon me and you will always be here. I may not want to talk now, but eventually I will.
- Ask me if I need any help because for sure I won’t ask.
- Validate my feelings. My first thoughts are always that I’m crazy. Tell me this is real and will go away.
- I know you can’t understand everything I’m feeling, but if you’ve said these things, I’ll know you have empathy for me.
So if I am quiet–it’s usually for a reason. Please help me help myself. And know how very much I love you for being my friend.
Please let us know what does and doesn’t help YOU. Leave a comment.